Personal Statement Writing – Scraps from the cutting room floor

I am currently in the process of constructing the world’s greatest personal statement. Step 1: open book purchased in final year of college and seek inspiration. Step 2: laugh hysterically. Step 3: weep. Step 4: wordpress.

“Note: Undie Run with stomach flu – determined to live my life to the fullest”
– Yup, a great idea to start a GRADUATE SCHOOL statement of purpose by telling the admissions committee that I once ran around in my underwear and vomited in a trash can outside Royce Hall. What a champ.

“I was going to be a princess, an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, a librarian… any number of admirable professions that did not involve a PhD.”
– Yeah, going to graduate school would be nice but it is still just my back up plan in case Prince Harry (princes are slim pickings these days) doesn’t ask me to be his wife. At the drop of a hat I would turn my back on academia and marry into a family so inbred that the royal publicists won’t let them speak more than 3 words in a row.

“If flying has taught me anything, it is that sardines must have phenomenal social skills.”
– I cannot begin to imagine the combination of extra practices, sleep deprivation, and exam week blues that culminated in this absurdly pointless combination of words.

“Putin’s masculine media shots”
– Perhaps I was trying to make a point about how interesting political science can be or perhaps I was fantasizing about Putin riding a horse in siberia or wrestling a bear (always half dressed). Whatever the case, shirtless autocrats have little place in my grad school admissions paper. That being said — have you seen that video of Putin getting a puppy… so. darn. CUTE!

Anyways, hope you have enjoyed this glimpse into my incredibly irreverent writing process. More to come in future weeks.


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