Okay, I admit it… I am only human. Sometimes I have bad days when all my goals seem impossible and my accomplishments to date seem insignificant. The trick for me has always been to latch on to one small success and use it to leap frog into the wonderful world of self-assurance. Case and point: having my SSHRC proposal forwarded by my department.
Background: SSHRC Doctoral Grants are worth $20,000 a year for 4 years ($35,000 if you win a CGS grant) and are awarded on the basis of academic merit and a 2 page proposal detailing your future doctoral research. If you are based at a university when you apply, your submission has to make it through 3 phases: a departmental review where they cut about 1/3, a university review where they cut another 1/3 , and a final assessment at the national level where they decide the winners.
Getting forwarded by the department is not a huge victory and certainly no predictor of future success, but it feels pretty good. I am a pretty competetive person so beating out 8 PhD students in my department is exciting, especially because it means that the committee chose to advance a proposal which will not alleviate their own funding burden (because I will likely not do doctoral work at UBC).
What’s more, this news comes at a great time: my Trudeau application is due Monday (see last post for more details) and I am right in the middle of PhD applications which, as anyone will tell you, can be demoralizing.
The bottom line: I am going to celebrate this little victory. So sue me. It isn’t everything but its something and hopefully a harbinger of future success. YAY! Now, back to grading.